Remembering Elder Richard G. Scott

Yesterday, the funeral services for Elder Richard G. Scott were held.  I watched them late last night before going to bed and am now ready to write this post.  On the evening of the 22nd, after everyone had gone to bed, I went on the internet to check up on any news stories I might be interested in reading.  When I clicked on to the Deseret News website, the first story to hit me was this one announcing Elder Scott's death.  Three apostles in four months have now completed their mortal ministry.  I was taken aback; not because of the suddenness of Elder Scott’s passing (he’s been in poor health for over a year now—we haven’t heard a Conference address from him since April 2014), but because of the timing.  We are a little over a week and a half away from the October General Conference and have lost another member of the Quorum of the Twelve.  Since I started really paying attention to conference, I have seen the calling of two new Apostles at the same time a couple of times (1984 and 2004), but never three at one time.

I have reacted differently to the passing of each of these brethren.  With Elder Perry I reminisced about his tie to Cokeville and how I was privileged to be in his presence on several occasions while I lived there (and, I didn't mention this, but one of those meetings was during a visit to Cokeville with Jennifer, Ben and Isaac during Cokeville's Pioneer Day celebration; all three of them were able to shake his hand ☺).  President Packer's passing brought memories of how several of his talks impacted my youth and how he continued to impact me as an adult.  Now, as I sit and ponder Elder Scott's influence, I find my thoughts first turning to the visit that didn't happen.  Several years ago (earlier 2010, I think), it was announced that Elder Scott would be our General Authority visitor for stake conference.  The announcement was electric.  For several weeks, the anticipation built.  How exciting it was to contemplate the opportunity to be taught be an Apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ during those two days.  But then, about two weeks before Stake conference would begin, it was announced that Elder Scott had been re-assigned.

The feeling was like watching the visiting team score the winning touchdown as the build-up of anticipation popped. Our general authority visitor became Elder Christopher Waddell who is now a member of the First Quorum of the Seventy, but, at the time, was our Area Authority Seventy in the Fifth Quorum of the Seventy.  His first comment to us in the Priesthood leadership session of the conference was something to the effect of: "I'm sure it wasn't me you were waiting to hear from today."  Elder Waddell went on to teach us in all the sessions very capably.  In fact, some of the things he talked to us about made its way into his first conference address (specifically about missionary work and the story of the Elder from Spain who was sent to a mission in Arizona and how his coming helped the man who had baptized the Elder's father years before).  I appreciated his words and his presence at the conference, but just the anticipation of being visited and taught be an Apostle was an amazing thing.

Elder Scott had such a kind, gentle demeanor, yet, he also had a way of looking into the camera with his piercing blue eyes while he spoke that made me feel as though he was talking directly to me and searching my soul at the same time.  His talks could be so personal; designed for individuals and yet accessible to all who listened to them or read them.  I recall one time being prompted by the Spirit to turn to one of Elder Scott's conference talks during an emotionally charged family situation before I was married that answered or countered every question or statement being made in that gathering.  I know I would have been totally inadequate to say those things the way Elder Scott had expressed them.

I also liked the examples or analogies he used in his talks.  In talking about catching fire spiritually, Elder Scott used an example of "a mixture of aluminum powder and metal oxide" (Ensign, May 1989, 35).  He continued, "By itself, it is cold and lifeless, but when heated to the ignition temperature, it becomes a self-sustaining source of brilliant light and intense heat. Once it ignites it cannot be put out by ordinary means. It will burn under water or in other environments that extinguish an ordinary flame. When it burns, it does not depend on its surroundings for support. It is self-sustaining" (ibid, 35).  I pictured this as testimony and living the gospel combining to achieve conversion.

An analogy I liked was given in his October 2006 address.  He used the difference between the rock climbing techniques of "soloing" and climbing with a companion with having the Savior as a companion on our earthly climb instead of attempting to "go it alone."  The analogy was turned into this video, which serves as a good visual to what Elder Scott was teaching.  Another analogy I liked is one I've used before in another post.  Talking about how strong emotions can overpower the delicate influence of the Spirit, Elder Scott said, "The inspiring influence of the Holy Spirit can be overcome or masked by strong emotions, such as anger, hate, passion, fear, or pride. When such influences are present, it is like trying to savor the delicate flavor of a grape while eating a jalapeño pepper. Both flavors are present, but one completely overpowers the other. In like manner, strong emotions overcome the delicate promptings of the Holy Spirit" (Ensign, Nov. 2009, 8).  There were many others (this one at the beginning of the talk, for example), but these are the 3 that come to mind right now.

Now, as I look toward the October Conference coming up in just a few short days, I am once again reminded that I will miss Elder Perry, President Packer and, now, Elder Scott.  I will miss his soothing voice and beautiful counsel.  At the same time, however, I know how wonderful it must be for him to be reunited with his wife, Jeanene, who passed from this life 20 years ago.  I think one of Elder Scott's most poniangant thoughts of her was said at the beginning of his April 2012 Conference address when he said, "Anyone who stands at this pulpit to deliver a message feels the strength and support of members throughout the world. I’m grateful that that same support can come from a beloved companion on the other side of the veil. Thank you, Jeanene" (Ensign, May 2012, 45).  Over the last several years, she has been on his mind because memories of her have appeared in several of his talks.  Although I didn't get the opportunity to hear him speak in our stake conference or to be able to shake his hand, I am grateful for the service Elder Scott rendered to me as an apostolic witness of the Lord Jesus Christ.

A Fair Assessment

Yeah, yeah, I’m being “cute” with the title, but I couldn’t help myself.  We went out on our first excursion as a trio today. ☺  A trip to the LA County Fair has been a Metcalfe tradition for quite some time now.  I have a vague memory of going to the Salt Lake County Fair in grade school (3rd grade, perhaps).  After moving to Wyoming we went several times to the Lincoln County Fair in Afton.  But my first visit to the Los Angeles County Fair blew me away.  It was so … BIG.  There was so many things to do and stuff to see and food to eat!  It was a sensory explosion.  I don’t think I had ever considered that a fair could be that large.  Now that I think about it, the Salt Lake fair was probably somewhat comparable as far as size is concerned, but I was six or seven at the time and we probably had very specific places to visit as a class; because I was herded from place to place, I may not have truly grasped the expansiveness of the experience.  For the first few years after the boys were born, we may have gone to the LA Fair sporadically, but as they became old enough to appreciate the experience, our on and off visits became a yearly event.

With Ben on his mission and the Grahams (who sometimes come with us on our trips to the fair) not able to make it this year, we made our yearly trek as a trio.  We can’t bring our lives to a screeching halt just because Ben isn’t here.  He’s serving the Lord in Colorado and we need to keep doing things that we would normally do.  Eventually, the trio will become (or return to) a duet.  When that happens Jennifer and I can’t stop doing things together just because our sons are out of the house and living their lives—how boring would that be. ☺  So, off we went, with our discount tickets from Ralph’s, to enjoy the final Saturday of the fair.  Yes, there were moments for all of us when we looked around and realized we were one short of our usual compliment, but those moments didn’t overwhelm our overall enjoyment of the day.  Those moments were comparable to when I returned home from my mission.  No sooner did I get off the plane then I was told that we were going to a mall in Salt Lake City to buy some clothes for various siblings.  There were a couple of times when I had “Where's my companion?” moments while I was there (plus it was weird being in a mall on a Saturday afternoon).  Today I had a couple of “Where's Ben?” moments (we all did at various times), but quickly reminded myself that he’s in Colorado.

All of our usual areas were visited.  We walked through all the Expo Hall buildings and checked out the booths.  Jennifer wanted fudge.  I'm not a huge fan anymore (it's too much concentrated chocolate for me), but she and Isaac enjoyed a piece as we looked at the different things for sale.  The Chinese acrobats show was, as always, a must see (although they didn’t seem to do as much this year as they have in the past).  This year the fair “discovery” building had to do with science fiction inventions that have become “science fact” (like Star Trek communicators and flip phones).  The first thing we saw as we walked into the building was a Doctor Who TARDIS (well, basically a replica of the front door).  I'm not sure when a time traveling machine disguised as a police box became a “science fact,” but, okay, I'll go along with it.  Besides, this gave Isaac and I a chance to have our pictures taken next to it.  Jennifer and Ben took pictures standing next to a “real” TARDIS when they went on a tour of the BBC while visiting London back in early June.  This was a chance for Isaac and me to at least have a somewhat similar experience (just not in London).  Also in the discovery building we found the Batmobile made for one of the 1980's movies (the 3rd one, I think) and the lightcycles in Tron

Garth George from our ward was found in the model train area of the fairgrounds.  We had met him there several times over the years.  Interestingly, we had thought about waiting to see the trains later in the day, but we weren’t far from the display and decided to go then.  If we hadn’t, we would have missed him because he had only 30 more minutes of his shift to go and was planning to head home as soon as it was completed.  The barns were visited as usual and we made our yearly trek to the cow milking demonstration.  I think it constantly amazes Jennifer that I used to milk cows in pretty much the same way when I was a teenager because she always mentions it while we are watching the demonstration.  After the demonstration, we made sure to stop and buy a pint of chocolate milk.  No trip to the fair would be complete without it.  Strawberry flavored milk was back on the menu this year, so we all wanted a pint of both flavors—chocolate is the best; so smooth and tasty! ☺  The Flower and Garden Pavilion was made had a Mardis Gras theme this year.  Murals made of flowers and seeds (like Rose Parade floats) depicted Mardis Gras costumes and masks.  We also visited an art display.  One of the pieces was a runaway stagecoach that I think was carved out of a single piece of wood.  The detail was quite good.  Jennifer also made sure we looked at the table decorating competition.

For dinner, we decided to try Juicy’s.  Isaac wanted the Outlaw Burger and Jennifer and I got the Giant Western Sausage in an equally large bun (it really is big).  It’s interesting that we finally ate here because we’ve been making fun of this place for about 5 years.  Isaac is not a fan of soda (doesn’t like the carbonation; didn’t take to it as a young boy and the embargo will probably continue throughout his life).  Five years ago, we bought hamburgers at Big Bubba’s BBQ (no, I'm not making that up ☺), but all they had to drink was soda.  I told Isaac that I would buy him lemonade at another place.  Throughout the day, whenever we passed Juicy’s, the advertisement’s voice would blare out all the different foods that could be purchased there, and then he would say: “And we’ve got lemonade, lemonade and more lemonade.”  Juicy’s was not too far from Bubba’s, so I figured it would be the easiest place to get Isaac’s lemonade.

After standing in line for at least 5 minutes (it was dinnertime and a lot of people were in line), I stepped up to the counter and said, “I like to get a regular-sized lemonade, please.”  The teenage worker looked at me like I’d suddenly grown a second head. “We’re all out of lemonade, sir,” he finally said.  I was caught off guard by this statement. “What do you mean, you’re out of lemonade?  Your sale pitch voice says you have ‘lemonade, lemonade and more lemonade.’  How can you tell me you have no lemonade when your advertisement seems to claim you have thousands of gallons?”  “I’m sorry, sir, but that’s just our advertisement.  We’re completely out of lemonade.”  “You’re seriously kidding me, right?”  He wasn’t.  Muttering under my breath, I stomped away.  It took me another 5 or so minutes to track down a place that actually sold lemonade.  By the time I got back to the table to eat, I put the cup in front of Isaac and said, “You better enjoy this!”  Of course, he gave me a look of, “What did I do?” while everyone else wanted to know what took me so long to get the lemonade.  When I told them the Juicy’s story, it quickly became a Metcalfe/Graham legend.  Over the last several years, we still use the “lemonade, lemonade and more lemonade” line in different settings. ☺  This was the first time we’d actually eaten their food and I have to say it was quite good … and they had lemonade! ☺

All in all, we had a fun time together.  We will do other activities as a trio, I'm sure, but based on our first outing, I think we’ll be able to handle it. ☺

Ben Has Arrived!

Ben arrived in the mission field yesterday.  Jennifer is on Facebook with a group of moms from the Colorado Denver North Mission and, it turns out, that Sister Mendenhall, the wife of the mission president is also a part of the group.  She posted this picture of the arriving group of missionaries.  There are 20 Elders in this group (with 2 more coming from the MTC in Mexico) and 3 sisters--quite a huge influx.  It's great to see Ben there with a big grin on his face.  Since he's in the back, I can't see his missionary tag, but I'm sure he is so excited to have it as a part of his new accessories. ☺  With all the posts I've written about Ben's preparation, I thought it would be nice to add this as an exclamation point! ☺  I pray for him and his trainer (Elder Morgan) and hope that he works hard and does his best.

And Then There Were Three

Yes, the title of my post is also the title of the 1978 album released by Genesis, but it is a good reflection of how I feel right now.  Jennifer and I had a feeling that emotionally we might not be in the best of situations to drive all the way home after dropping Ben off at the MTC.  Our trip back to Joanna's house pretty much strengthened that thought.  We weren't crying or carrying on ridiculously (sackcloth and ashes, wailing like banshees in a blizzard), but it was a pretty melancholy trip.  Coming back to Joanna and Chad's house gave us some extra time to take a deep breath and exhale slowly--allowing the reality of our new familial situation sink in a bit.  The extra day helped to get us in the right frame of mind for the 8 hour return trip and I am grateful that Joanna and Chad graciously put up with us for one extra day.  On Thursday as we drove south along the I-15, we all waved in the direction of the Provo Temple when we saw it (the MTC is across the street).  We were a bit more contemplative during the time we drove through Provo, but we are also happy to know that Ben is where he has chosen to be.

I decided to make a stop at the Payson Temple on our trip home.  Ben had wanted to see it, during our drive home after our vacation, but the grounds would have been closed because of Pioneer Day that day and I wanted to get home as quickly as possible.  On our trip to Layton on Monday, I thought of stopping, but, again, the grounds would have been closed and we were running a bit later than I had anticipated; I apologized and didn't stop.  This time, the grounds were open and I thought it would be a nice diversion--a tribute to Ben, in a way.  Not exactly knowing how to get to the temple, I missed the exit.  Jennifer thought I wouldn't turn back, but I was determined to get there and didn't mind getting off at the next exit about 2 miles south of the correct exit and turning around.  Once properly off the freeway, I missed the turn onto the correct street, but it wasn't too difficult to turn onto the next street and work my way back through the residential streets (thankfully, most Utah towns are set out in Brigham Young blocks; not mazes like many California streets ☺).  Finally, after a few turns here and there, we arrived at the front gates.

The Payson Temple was dedicated in June of this year.  We found the temple and the surrounding grounds to be very beautiful.  Even though it was Thursday, there were two wedding parties outside taking pictures.  A beautiful fountain adorned the area in front of the temple and a smaller fountain graced the opposite side.  The outside walls of the temeple seemed to have a light peach (or, perhaps cream) color that reminded me of the Manti Temple.  I thought the color allowed the building to blend in with the surrounding hills.  I don't know exactly what it was about our visit to the Payson Temple.  The basic design isn't unlike others that have been recently built, but there is also a uniqueness about the design that I really liked.  Isaac very much enjoyed the time we spent on the temple grounds.  As we got back into the car to resume our journey home, Isaac told us that the Payson Temple was now his favorite temple and he would like to go inside after he receives his endowment and has his full temple recommend.  I wouldn't mind fulfilling that desire because I think I would like to go inside as well. ☺

From there, we made good time returning to California.  We stopped in Barstow to eat dinner.  The choice was between Carl's Jr. and In-n-Out; Carl's won this time.  As we were eating, Isaac announced that he had made a decision to obtain his patriarchal blessing.  He told us that he'd been thinking about it a lot lately and now wanted to receive it.  I have a feeling that seeing Ben leave on his mission helped him to finalize his decision.  I am happy that he feels that now is the time for him to receive this wonderful blessing from his Father in Heaven.  We told him that he would need to make an appointment with Bishop Galindo to obtain a recommend for receipt of a patriarchal blessing and then make an appointment with the Stake Patriarch.  I suspect the blessing will happen within the next couple to three weeks. ☺

The Day Has Come

One Last Family Picture before leaving to the MTC

Ben has entered the MTC in Provo, Utah.  Other families in our area who have recently dropped off missionaries warned us that we would not have much time at the curb to say good-bye to Ben.  In response to this lack of sufficient time, I had cooked up a scenario to meet with any of his aunts or uncles who could not make it to Joanna's house to come to either the park area between the MTC and Provo Temple or another nearby meeting place to give Ben a definite send-off before we officially dropped him off.  Life, as it has a tendency to do no matter how hard to try to stop it, got in the way of this plan and it had to be scrapped.  I am grateful that Aaron and Jay made time to call Ben and say good-bye; he appreciated hearing from both of them very much.  Actually, in a way, it was probably easier that my grand plan didn't work out.  As I looked at the "park" where I had planned to have this get-together, I found it filled to the gills with other families all doing the same thing.  It looked like such a mad house over there that I'm not sure we would have been able to even find a parking spot.  Ben had asked me to give him a father's blessing before we left Joanna's house and we all had a special moment with him before we piled into the car to drive to Provo.  That moment served the purpose I had envisioned.

The only thing marking the entrance of the MTC was the green street sign hanging from the stop light and the jam of cars streaming into said entrance.  In my day (wow, did I just write that; I sound so old ☺), a large black sign on the curb marked the MTC entrance (it was a definite photo shot from many missionaries.  I remember my family parking the family car in the parking lot and all of us trooping into an auditorium near the front desk.  Inside that auditorium, a 25 to 30 minute video introducing the MTC and its purposes was shown.  At the conclusion of the video, families were given a moment to say their good-byes and then they were led out the back door while missionaries were herded through another door.  Over the last several years, the protocol has changed.  As soon as I was able to pull the car into the driveway of the MTC, cone markers split the cars into two lanes.  I picked the left lane and manuvered slowly forward until I was next to an older gentleman wearing an orange vest with one vertical yellow stripe on each side.  "Dropping off an Elder of Sister?" he asked.  "Elder," I replied.  He glanced into the car as he placed a long, yellow sticky note on the windshield and welcomed Ben to the MTC.  "Follow the Elder's directions," he said.  I glanced forward and found an Elder wearing the same orange vest directing me to the right.

I slowly followed his hand signals and quickly was directed by a third man to park behind a SUV several feet in front of me.  As I brought the car to a stop, the man said, "Please unload quickly." I popped the trunk, got out of the car and moved to retrieve Ben's luggage.  Isaac hopped out and started filming the moment.  Jennifer took the video camera from him to allow him to give Ben a quick hug.  While Jennifer was hugging Ben, an Elder walked forward and introduced himself.  As I gave Ben a last hug, I heard Jennifer say, "Elder Dailey is going to help you."  Elder Dailey was already reaching for the larger luggage.  Ben slung his shoulder bag over his shoulder while Elder Dailey asked, "What's you're last name Elder?" "Metcalfe," Ben replied.  "Elder Metcalfe, welcome to the MTC," Elder Dailey said.  As they walked away from the car, I heard Elder Dailey ask Ben where he was assigned and Ben replied, "Denver."  "There are a lot of people going to Denver," Elder Dailey replied.  That was the last thing I heard as the two prepared to step onto the sidewalk.  Ben turned around once to give us one last quick look, a "I love you" sign, and a huge grin.  He then continued on his way without looking back.

And so it begins: Ben with a long-standing goal; and us adjusting to the fact that we are now three instead of four. ☺  I am (we are) so happy for him.  The days leading up to this moment seemed so surreal in a way, but now everything that was "the future" is "the now."  I can't wait to read Ben's emails and see how much his mission will change him for the better.  I wish him all the best.

Our Final Full Day with Ben

Ready to go to the MTC

For our final full day with Ben before taking him to the Missionary Training Center (MTC), we visited the last temple in the list of temples we wanted to take him to (and he wanted to visit): the Salt Lake Temple.  I don't think it is inappropriate to call this temple the "flagship" temple of the Church.  After the forerunner temple built in Kirtland, Ohio and the first "fully functional" temple built in Nauvoo, Illinois, the plans for the Salt Lake Temple began not long after the vanguard pioneer wagons entered the Salt Lake valley when Brigham Young marked the spot where the temple would stand.  Before the Salt Lake Temple was completed, however, three other temples were started and completed in St. George, Manti, and Logan, Utah.  The Salt Lake Temple took 40 years to build and was completed the day before it's dedication on April 6, 1893.  This is one of Ben's top three favorite temples and we were also happy to have my sister Joanna join us.

Isaac Takes a Selfie w/ the Temple

This temple visit almost didn't happen.  Over the years, Jennifer has become our designated packer person when it comes to getting us ready for long trips (I don't believe the assignment was ever specifically given to her, it has just evolved that way).  However, in this particular trip, Jen was very focused on getting Ben all packed and ready to go to the MTC (rightfully so).  I will admit that I should have taken a more active role in making sure the remaining members of the family were packed, but I became focused on other details that caught my eye and (at least in my brain) demanded my attention on the morning we finalized packing and loaded up the rental car for the trip.  Because of this focus of attention to Ben and other things, certain packing details were missed.  About 30 minutes into our trip, Jennifer realized we had left our vitamins and other medicines at home.  A little later, we realized we had forgotten to pack a few other minor details.  It wasn't until we were approaching Mesquite, Nevada, however, that we also realized we had left our temple bags at home.  At first, this wasn't such a big deal, temple clothing can be rented at the Salt Lake Temple, until Jennifer also realized that her temple recommend is in her temple bag (it has a convenient little slot for recommends).

Christmas Lights in September

Now, we had a problem.  Without a recommend, Jennifer would not be able to enter the temple.  Because of the "recommend slot" in her temple bag, its been years since Jen has forgotten her recommend.  Early in our marriage, this situation occurred twice before I told Jennifer to let me keep her recommend in my wallet (which I did until she received her first temple bag as a Christmas present and her recommend switched to the slot).  The mood in the car was very solemn for several minutes until Jen remembered the remedy that helped us back in the day: calling the bishop to confirm to the temple that she is a recommend holder in good standing.  As we entered Arizona and approached the Virgin River Canyon, she made a phone call to Bishop Galindo and explained her predicament.  He gave her his phone number and told her to have the front desk at the temple call him when we arrived.  This is what we did this morning and she was allowed to participate with Ben.  We were grateful for this blessing, but it also reiterated for me something that I always tell people taking the temple preparation classes while teaching Lesson 6: don't forget to bring your recommend. ☺

Because we forgot our temple bags, we had also left our family file names behind—meaning that we would not be able to go through the endowment session for one of our kindred.  This situation was solved by Joanna.  After finally finding a parking spot under the Conference Center (that was an odyssey in and of itself ☺), she handed to each of us names of a family line she has been working on.  We were grateful to be able to help her and to also be able to do temple work for ancestors.  I had told Ben that one of the wonderful aspects of the Celestial Room of the Salt Lake Temple was the intricate woodwork and carvings.  To know that these were hand crafted by the pioneers makes the all of the rooms amazing.  Ben was in awe in each of the rooms as we progressed through the session, but his eyes lit up in amazement as he entered the final room.  As we sat quietly talking, two things happened, Jennifer finally cried (not that she hadn't been emotional throughout Ben's entire process, but this was the first time those emotions leaked out of her eyes ☺); and I realized again the satisfaction that I've been feeling and that this was the final time I'd be able to sit next to Ben in the temple for two years.  I've been enjoying having him with me as we've visited the 4 temples I've chronicled over the last several weeks, but I understood I am ready to turn him over to the Lord for his mission.

Roof of the Conference Center

Brothers

When we were finally ready to leave the temple, we met back up with Isaac (he had spent the time on the grounds of temple square, taking a couple of selfies and talking to the Sister missionaries).  One of things Isaac had learned was that workers were already putting Christmas lights into the trees of the temple block.  There are so many trees and areas to prepare that it takes months to get the lights ready for the unveiling the day after Thanksgiving.  Joanna left to return home to be ready for her children when they finished school.  We spent the rest of the afternoon picking up some last minute items at Deseret Book (scripture marking pens, a small copy of Preach My Gospel, and another journal), eating ice cream, and taking a tour of the Conference Center (probably our 4th or 5th tour, but I'm always fascinated by the fact that each guide—while mentioning the main aspects of the building—always seems to tell us something different and new as well).  Our final stop on the way back to Joanna and Chad's house was to stop at Mr. Mac (the same store where we bought Ben's brown suit) and buy the final two items on our list (a shoe shine kit and a wallet—his Green Bay Packers wallet didn't seem appropriate ☺).  Ben now has all the physical accouterments, the rest is up to him. ☺