Set Apart

Ben at the "open house" held after his setting apart

Ben was set apart as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints by President Skinner today.  After the Sunday session of Stake conference ended, family and friends entered the High Council room while Ben talked with President Skinner for 10 to 15 minutes.  Since our stake is so large and spread out, the Sunday session is broadcast via the internet to several other buildings.  Some of our ward members watched from our regular church building and then drove the few miles to the stake center.  We decided to come to the stake center (figured it would be easier that way).  This turned out to be an interesting decision because right after the "rest hymn" by the stake youth choir, President Skinner asked two people from the congregation to come to the podium and bear their testimonies—Jennifer was one of the two.  She talked about how she was given a little glimpse of this moment in the Los Angeles Temple while she was pregnant with Ben and now that "little glimpse" had become a reality.  She mentioned how she hadn't cried because she knew this is what Ben wanted and she was ready to turn him over to the Lord.

Honestly, I'm the one who is doing most of the crying at the moment. ☺  The closing hymn for the conference was "God Be with You Till We Meet Again."  I took this as Heavenly Father giving me a tender mercy.  I have remembered a time as I was a boy (maybe 9 or 10, perhaps) when this hymn closed a missionary farewell.  As we sang, I noticed my Dad getting choked up—tears streaming down his cheeks.  When I asked him what was wrong, he nodded toward the podium.  At first, I didn't know what he meant; everything looked the same to me.  Then my dad said, "Look at Brother ____" (I don't remember his name after all these years ☺).  I focused on the father of the missionary and I saw what my dad was talking about.  Brother _____ had turned in his seat and was singing the hymn to his departing son.  As the weeks leading to Ben's departure have turned to days, I've wanted to do something similar, but, short of demanding that our ward chorister sing the hymn to end Sacrament meeting (that would fly like a lead balloon), I was at a loss as to how I could do it.  Now, here was my opportunity!  Ben had left his chair (we didn't make it to the chapel early enough to sit in the pews, although he nearly made it through the entire meeting before he needed to get up from his uncomfortable chair) and was standing against the wall to support his back.  I caught his eye and sang the first line of the hymn to him and then became so overwhelmed with emotion that I couldn't continue (I basically mouthed the words for the remainder of the hymn), but it was enough.  He understood the gesture.

To be "set apart" is another unique aspect of the Church.  The phrase can be taken to mean that a person is being set apart to accomplish a particular calling.  In every calling I have received, a priesthood leader either from the ward or stake has placed his hands on my head and set me apart to accomplish the specific assignment I have accepted and been sustained by the ward members to accomplish.  Sometimes I wonder if we, as members, take this lightly.  We shouldn't; for as part of the setting apart, the priesthood leader is also prompted to give us a blessing—a blessing given through inspiration from the Holy Ghost to help the person in that specific calling.  President Spencer W. Kimball testified, “The setting apart may be taken literally; it is a setting apart from sin, apart from the carnal; apart from everything which is crude, low, vicious, cheap, or vulgar; set apart from the world to a higher plane of thought and activity” (The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, ed. Edward L. Kimball [1982], 478).

To listen to President Skinner set Benjamin apart as a missionary for the Church was an amazing thing for me.  It was my wonderful opportunity to stand next to President Skinner in the priesthood circle as he, authorized by the First Presidency, accomplished this priesthood task.  I don't remember my own missionary setting apart.  I think it may have been a very small gathering of my stake president and family.  I'm not even sure if my father was allowed to participate.  But as I listened to the words spoken by President Skinner, tears again came to my eyes and when the blessing was completed and Ben hugged me, I dissolved into a blubbering mess.  Don't misunderstand, however.  I have not found myself crying because I am sad or anxious or missing Ben already.  During the open house we held for Ben later on today, I talked to Jared Graham (who recently returned from his mission to Chile) and I think I was finally able to describe my feelings in a way that makes sense to me.  I told him that I have been feeling satisfaction.  I have had the opportunity to teach Ben for 18 years and to now see him taking those truths I have tried my best to instill in him and use them to make proper, positive choices is bringing me a great deal of satisfaction.  Not in a boastful or improper way, but in a way that brings me great joy—joy expressed through tears.

I believe I can say that I have gained my own "little glimpse" into what Ammon felt when he declared to his brothers, "I do not boast in my own strength, nor in my own wisdom; but behold, my joy is full, yea, my heart is brim with joy, and I will rejoice in my God" (Alma 26:11, emphasis added). I have served a mission and know how it has benefited my life since returning home.  I know that this mission can do the same for Ben.  To see him make these decisions to follow the Lord by exercising his own moral agency and not based on any coercion on my part in any way, brings me a joy that I cannot fully describe but constantly causes "my cup [to] runneth over" (Psalms 23:5).  I am so grateful to my Father in Heaven for the blessings He brings into my life.  I know that if Ben goes forward and does all that he can to apply the teachings of the Savior, Jesus Christ, in his life, he will be an instrument in bringing others to an understanding of those same principles.  It won't be any easy thing to accomplish—nothing worthwhile ever is—but I know that if he relies upon the Lord, he will be able to accomplish all things asked of him (see Alma 26:12).

Isaac's 1st Sacrament Blessing & Ben's Farewell

Two important things happened today: Isaac blessed the sacrament for the first time and Ben gave his "farewell" address to the ward.  While I was picking up an investigator who needed a ride to church (his car is in the shop), Ben asked Jordan (who happened to be the only other priest in our meeting today) if he and I could accompany Isaac at the sacrament table—Jordan graciously allowed us to participate.  As the three of us sat down behind the sacrament table, I couldn't help but remember the time four years ago when Isaac was ordained as a deacon and he, Ben and I participated in passing the sacrament together.  The next time I was able to bear my testimony after that experience, I told the congregation that I have a montage of pictures at my desk showing me with Ben and Isaac at places, venues or life moments over the years (I chosen one picture per year for the last 9 years).  But no matter how memorable our experiences captured by those photos have been, nothing could top the experience I had as I passed the sacrament with them—until today.

Just before the sacrament hymn began, Isaac told me he was both nervous and excited.  When I asked him which prayer he wanted to say, he told me he wanted to say the prayer over the bread.  I started to tell him to take a deep breath and say the prayer clearly and succinctly, but the singing started before I could mention those thoughts.  Isaac was in the middle, with me at his right and Ben at his left.  I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he took his time breaking the bread.  There were 5 trays, so he only had to focus on the one in the middle, but he did so very conscientiously.  The hymn ended and he knelt to say the prayer.  His nervousness got the better of him a few times and he had to correct himself.  Bishop asked him to say it again.  He composed himself and said the prayer a second time.  The first time had worked out his nerves and he did better the second time.  We passed the trays of bread to the Aaronic Priesthood teachers and deacons and returned to our seats.  I patted Isaac on the knee and told him he did a good job.  After returning the bread trays to the table and uncovering the water trays, Ben said the prayer over the water.  When all who were desirous to partake of the emblems had received them, we placed the water trays back on the table, carefully covered them and returned to our seats.

Wow!  What a great experience!  Next week is stake conference.  After the Sunday session, Ben will be set apart as a missionary and then we will drive to Utah to drop him off at the Provo Missionary Training Center.  Today was the only time we could serve together at the sacrament table before Ben leaves.  There is no picture of this event to add to my montage at work, but the memory is forever emblazoned in my mind: me and my two sons, serving together as we administer the sacrament to the congregation.  After the meeting, there were several people who told me they enjoyed Ben's talk, but they enjoyed even more watching us at the sacrament table.  I am grateful that we are all worthy to serve.

After Jennifer shared a brief testimony, Ben was given the opportunity to speak.  He mentioned that in May of 2013 that he received his patriarchal blessing.  Only a few months later, he injured his back which eventually brought his disorder to light along with all of the problems that accompanied it.  He expressed that without his patriarchal blessing to help him keep things in perspective, he would have been so lost.  Two years of trial have prepared him for the two years of missionary service now ahead of him.  His talk assignment was to discuss the things he has done to prepare for his mission.  He told us there were four things his trials have helped him to learn, which in turn has prepared him for his mission:

1) Patience - As he worked through his trials, Ben found that he needed to be patient with himself and with the Lord.  I was reminded of a talk on patience by Elder Neal A. Maxwell referenced in an article in this month's Ensign.  Elder Maxwell taught: "Patience is tied very closely to faith in our Heavenly Father. Actually, when we are unduly impatient we are suggesting that we know what is best—better than does God. ... Patience is a willingness, in a sense, to watch the unfolding purposes of God with a sense of wonder and awe, rather than pacing up and down within the cell of our circumstance" (“Patience” [Brigham Young University devotional, Nov. 27, 1979], 1, 2, speeches.byu.edu).  From what Ben said, I believe he has gained a greater perspective of God’s unfolding purposes for him.

2) Scripture study - Ben had faltered on his scripture study for several months before his appendix burst inside of him last July.  One of the things that happened to him while he was stuck in the hospital for 11 days was that he got back into the routine of reading his scriptures every day and he hasn’t faltered since.  This has been a blessing to him and has helped him to teach when he has teamed up with the missionaries.

3) What the Church means to him - During these last two years, Ben said he has gained a greater understanding of what the Church means to him.  To my mind, he has become more fully converted to the gospel of Jesus Christ and its teachings as he now desires to, as he expressed it, "be one of Jesus' sheep and do whatever He asks of me."  His attitude reminded me of a quote from a conference talk given by Sister Bonnie L. Oscarson, "For ... all of us, conversion to gospel principles comes through righteously living the principles of the gospel and being true to our covenants with the Lord" (Ensign, Nov. 2013, 76).  Ben's stronger conversion and greater understanding of what the Church means to him personally have helped him prepare to take on the added covenants of the temple and the additional responsibility to serve as a missionary.

4) He is never alone - He thanked us, his family, for being there for him and doing little things that have helped him get through his hard times (he thanked friends as well).  But as much as we have all tried to help him and be there for him, none of us can escape the fact that we truly do not completely understand what he is feeling at times.  For that, he expressed the knowledge that he has obtained to know that Father in Heaven is always there for him and Jesus Christ knows what he is going through.  I was reminded of Elder David A. Bednar's testimony: "There is no physical pain, no spiritual wound, no anguish of soul or heartache, no infirmity or weakness you or I ever confront in mortality that the Savior did not experience first. In a moment of weakness we may cry out, 'No one knows what it is like. No one understands.' But the Son of God perfectly knows and understands, for He has felt and borne our individual burdens" (Ensign, May 2014, 90).  Ben has gained a strong understanding of Christ’s perfect empathy.

I know there are people in the Colorado Denver North Mission who are waiting to hear Ben's unique experiences.  The Lord is sending him to this area of His vineyard because of the opportunities for growth that he will experience and the people who he will be able to lift and who will lift him.  If he goes out and applies himself to the best of his ability, he will be successful in finding these people; member and non-member.  After Ben concluded his talk and we sang the intermediate hymn, I looked him and he looked at me.  Not a word was spoken between us, but the moment spoke volumes and caused us both to cry.  I recalled a similar moment when Ben was a new-born.  He was struggling with major reflux problems (he couldn't hold his food down—I learned this the hard way when he projectile vomited all over me after I fed him his bottle one night) and had been placed in the NICU at Loma Linda for a week while the doctors tried to figure out how to help him.  Our bishop, at that time, came with me to help give Ben a blessing during his first night in the hospital.  After I concluded the blessing, I remember a similar look passed between us.  Ben's spirit-self shone through his eyes at that moment as if to say, "Thank you, Dad.  Don't worry; I'll get through this."  Eighteen years later, we've helped each other get through the trials that have come our way.  I've known for years that he has a strong spirit; it will serve him well during this next chapter of his life.

A New Perspective of the Los Angeles Temple

On October 12, 1957, a little over a year and a half after its dedication, my grandparents on my Mom's side were sealed in the Los Angeles Temple; immediately afterward, my Mom and her sister and brother were sealed to them.  Not quite 8 years later, my parents were sealed in the Los Angeles Temple on September 11, 1965.  A few months over 30 years after that, Jennifer and I were also sealed in the same temple.  From this, I think it may be clear as to why the Los Angeles Temple holds a special place in my heart—three generations of my family tree have been sealed for time and all eternity there.  I believe I have written about this a little bit in other posts (this one, for instance), but somewhere in the time frame of a few months before Ben's birth to a few months afterward, I came across a story of two little boys (about 10 years old) bringing their younger brother (4 or 5 years old) in a wagon to the Salt Lake Temple (I wish I knew if there was an internet link to the story, but I haven't a clue now what the title of the story is or where I read it).  When asked by a watchman what the boys were doing, they replied they were bringing little "Johnny" (I'm not sure if that was the name, but it sounds good J) to the temple to allow him to touch the wall.  The watchman told them to carry on and the boys rolled the wagon next to wall of the temple and encouraged their little brother to touch it.  As he did so, they said to him something like, "Now you can remember the time when you first touched the temple."

Touching the Los Angeles Temple for the first time

That story had a profound effect on me.  From the moment I read it, I wanted to start a family tradition with my son that reflected the one told in the story.  While Ben could hear us teach about the importance of the temple and see us attending the temple once a month, by enhancing his experience through the sense of touch—employing three senses instead of just one or two—the tactile reinforcement could strengthen even more for Ben the love his parents had for the temple and what it represents.  When we felt Ben was old enough, we took him on his first visit to the Los Angeles Temple.  Then, as part of our walk around the grounds, I took him out of his stroller and approached the south facing wall.  Underneath the words The House of the Lord, we touched a temple together for the first time (Jennifer capturing the image on film).  A year later, we were back and Ben and I touched the temple again and Jennifer also froze that moment in time on film.  The next time we returned, Isaac was included and the three of us began what has become our tradition of touching the temples we have visited over the years.  The several experiences of touching the Los Angeles Temple had the impact I had hoped for.  During our first trip to Palmyra as a family in the summer of 2000, Ben was so excited to see the, then, recently dedicated Palmyra Temple that he asked to see it 3 times during our two day outing.  On the first of our three visits, he ran as fast as his little legs would go in order to get close to the temple and waved hello to Moroni.  It wasn't long before he asked to, "Touch it; temple."  When we finally gave him the green light, he ran to the wall we had chosen (which included the cap stone indicating the year of dedication) and had a moment there that, to this day, Jennifer and I are grateful I captured on video.

Our second LA Temple picture

The Redlands Temple was completed and dedicated in September of 2003, about 4 months after we moved to High Desert.  With the change in our temple district, our trips to the Los Angeles Temple dropped to once a year in December to see the Christmas lights.  While we lived in Colton, however, we were a part of the Los Angeles Temple district.  Most of the time, when we planned our monthly trip to LA, Jennifer was able to get a babysitter for the boys.  We had our routine down pretty good.  I’d come home from work (my commute in those days was 10 minutes), Jennifer would pick up the babysitter, we’d grab a fast food dinner (usually at Carl’s Jr.) and off we’d go to Los Angeles.  Since most everyone on the freeways were leaving LA, we could make it to the temple in about an hour, complete a session and be back by 10:30 pm (usually, we went on Fridays).  On those occasions where we either couldn’t find or couldn’t afford a babysitter, we would go to the temple on Saturday and bring Ben and Isaac with us.   Even though Jennifer and I couldn't go inside the temple on those days, we would walk the grounds with our sons and go into the visitor’s center to watch Church videos and let them explore the interactive displays.  We would still count the time spent as our monthly temple trip even though it had turned into a family outing.  With this brief history as a backdrop, I hope the emotions of this day can be better appreciated.  Ben wanted to come to this temple and we wanted to bring him and give him the opportunity to go inside and experience this family landmark in a completely different way.

Alana and her mom, Angie, accompanied us on this trip.  We found out that neither of them had been inside the Los Angeles Temple either, so Jennifer and I were even happier to accompany all three on their first experience inside the temple.  As we walked up toward the front doors, Ben took a moment to touch the wall of the temple.  I noticed him and made a mental note of it while also mentally kicking myself for leaving our camera at home.  Because the Los Angeles Temple is so large, one of the major differences between it and the Redlands Temple is that Los Angeles has a cafeteria inside the building. J  Having arrived at around noon with plenty of time before the next session, we decided to eat lunch first.  I hadn’t eaten lunch in the cafeteria of the temple for several years.  It was nice for the five of us to sit among temples workers and other patrons and eat a nice meal.  When lunch was finished, we still had plenty of time to get ready and attend the endowment session.

Adding Isaac to our picture

The Los Angeles Temple according to this website, was "the last temple designed for live-acting presentation of the endowment."  As such it has several ordinance rooms that allow for a progression through the endowment ordinance that can only be found in 7 other temples.  I caught Ben with his mouth agape a couple of times as we moved from room to room and saw the wonderful, hand-painted murals in each room.  Once again, it was the Celestial Room that Ben liked the most (I tried to find a picture, but was unsuccessful).  The peace that washed over him as he entered the representation of Father's dwelling place was wonderful for him.  We again spent a while in the Celestial Room quietly talking.  When everyone was ready, we left change out of our white temple clothing and begin the drive home.  As we exited the temple, I watched as Ben returned to the spot where he had touched the temple earlier in the day and put his hand out to touch the wall of the temple again.  This time, his attitude was more contemplative.  For 18 years we have come to the Los Angeles Temple and touched the wall as a way to show our love for the Lord's Holy House.  Now, I could see in Ben's simple movement, a new reverence for this building that has played such a huge part in our family's story through 3 generations.  It was a nice moment.  One that I hope he is able to hold close to his heart for the rest of this life here on earth.

Ordaining a Priest

Today I ordained Isaac as a priest in the Aaronic Priesthood.  With this increase in responsibility, he will be able to administer the sacrament, or, in other words, act as the priesthood voice in blessing either the bread or the water when this ordinance takes place during our ward’s sacrament meeting.  He has also received the authority through this ordination to baptize someone a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints if so asked.  Another thing he can now do (and I know he is very excited about this) is to go out with the missionaries on team-ups.  I know he is looking forward to participating in administering the sacrament and I’m sure he’d be honored by an opportunity to baptize someone, but the thing he has definitely been looking forward to doing is to participate with the missionaries in lessons (he keeps reminding all of us constantly ☺).

My personal feeling is that Isaac has had this desire to go with the missionaries bubbling under the surface as he’s watched Ben do the same, but I think it really started to brew when I took him with me on a team-up assignment with Elders Bowman and Sheppard back in January of this year.  It happened during the time when Ben and Jennifer were in Orange County while Ben was being mentored for his senior project.  The missionaries I mentioned called and asked if I would come out with them to a couple of appointments and I felt impressed to bring Isaac with me instead of leaving him at home.  He told me afterward that it was a real eye-opener for him to be a part of the meeting.  I think he began to understand at a greater level what it meant to teach people the gospel as a missionary and that there was more to it than he had thought.

As Isaac’s opportunity to be ordained a priest has approached, he has become more and more excited because he realized that he can now go out with the missionaries as Ben has.  I think this was one of the reasons that he asked all four Elders to participate in his priesthood circle.  In my last official act as ward mission leader, I created a new team-up list since the other one had expired and I made sure Isaac was paired up with me for that evening.  September 15 is the day we have our turn and he is looking forward to that day with anticipation (he’s hoping he can go out with them before then, but he is waiting for his assigned day as well J).

The Apostle John wrote: “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth” (3 John 1:4).  I would modify his quote to say “I have no greater joy than to see my children walk in truth.”  With Ben coming to the temple last Saturday and taking upon him the covenants connected with being “endowed with power from on high” (D&C 38:32) and ordaining Isaac today as a priest in the Aaronic Priesthood, I can say that I have great joy in watching my sons walk in truth.  I mentioned in a recently post that I have been prompted to state in blessings, that Heavenly Father is pleased with the person being blessed.  I believe this last week has helped me gain a small insight as to how He feels as I’ve watched my sons exercise their moral agency and truly walk in the truth Heavenly Father offers us in this mortal probation. J

Visiting the San Diego Temple

I can’t remember the year, but the first time I saw the San Diego Temple I was driving south on the I-5 and it was under construction.  The two large steeples were steel girders, devoid of the wonderful texture that now graces them.  I remember thinking even back at that time (1990 or 1991) that the design looked different than other temples I was familiar with.  The shortened story behind the design, from the way I have come to understand it, is that when the Church was ready to begin construction, the three head architects (two Catholics and a Mormon, interestingly enough) were initially asked to use the same basic design as the Boise, Idaho or Las Vegas, Nevada Temples.  But the property and the aesthetics of the area didn’t really lend itself to that particular design.  Realizing this, the three asked the leadership of the Church if they could be allowed to come up with their own design for the San Diego Temple and were given permission.  The result of their efforts was a temple with a very unique shape.  As with any other temple, however, the wonderful spirit attending the special work conducted inside for both the living and the dead is the greater draw.

Over the years, whenever we have traveled down to the San Diego area, we have almost always ended up visiting the San Diego Temple.  As I’ve looked through our digital pictures (and the photo albums Jen created for both Ben and Isaac when they were younger), I’ve found photos of us with some portion of the San Diego Temple in the background (here is one with Ben and Isaac and their Aunt Heather from a visit she made back in 2009 J).  Now that Ben has received his own endowments, Jennifer and I wanted to take him inside the local temples that we have visited outside for so many years.  San Diego took its turn today. J

I guess I shouldn’t have been, but I was amazed by the number of weddings taking place at the time we arrived!  It appears that San Diego, because of its unique architecture, is a desired location for many wanting to be married in the House of the Lord. J  We arrived at noon and were lucky to get a parking spot from someone who was leaving (she actually back out in such a way as to block anyone from trying to snag it from us).  Since we knew that sessions started every 30 minutes from 12:30 to 2:00, we decided to eat the lunch we had brought before leaving the car (which worked because the spot we had been able to procure was in shade).  Afterward, we walked the grounds for a few moments.  I guess we’ve usually come to the San Diego Temple at times when it has been less likely that a wedding would be held or on a day other than a Saturday.  I’m not sure I’ve ever seen so many people milling about on the grounds either waiting for brides and grooms to exit the temple or to find out if they needed to be included in a picture.  After a few minutes, we decided to go inside.  With the time we had taken for lunch and the few minutes we had spent outside, we were set for the 1:00 session … and then found out that the principle language for that session would be Spanish.  We could have used headphones, but after discussing the situation we decided to wait for the 1:30 session.

We were told we could sit on a bench at the foot of a grand staircase as we waited for one of the temple workers to tell us when it would be time to gather in a small chapel for the next session.  As we quietly talked, we saw several more brides and grooms either being ushered toward a sealing room or toward a door leading outside where family and friends had gathered to wait for them (at one point, one of the newly married couples must have stepped exited the building for a loud cheer erupted that we could hear J).  Several minutes later, a sister directed us to an elevator in order for Ben to avoid the staircase.

After years of visiting the San Diego temple, walking the grounds and touching the exterior walls, it was fun to share the temple with Ben in a way he has never experienced before.  As he prepares to leave on his mission, attending the temple will help him gain greater spiritual strength.  He really enjoyed coming into the Celestial Room at the end of the session.  I found this picture and want to include it give an idea of the beautiful way these rooms represent coming into the presence of the Father.  The sweet, peaceful feeling that washed over us as we entered the room was wonderful.  We spent some time quietly talking and then left to return home.  Next week, we will take Ben to the Los Angeles Temple.

New Calling

There are several constants in The Church of Jesus Chris of Latter-day Saints: 1) the basic teachings the gospel of Jesus Christ; 2) we are led by “apostles and prophets, Jesus Christ himself being the chief corner stone” (Ephesians 2:20); and 3) eventually your present calling will end and a new calling will be issued.  Number 3 happened to me on Friday—it was made official today.  When I came home from work, Friday, Jennifer mentioned to me that Bishop had called.  When I returned the phone call, he asked if I could come over and talk with him for about 20 minutes.  After I finished dinner, I drove over to his house and he told me that I was to be released as ward mission leader and extended the new call to me.  “What is the new assignment?” you ask?  Well, hang on to that thought as I talk about the calling that is ending for a moment. ☺

As I was talking to Bishop, it struck me that I've served in this calling for a little over 2 years.  I suppose I could say that I've symbolically served another mission.  Thinking back to that day in June of 2013 at the Hill Cumorah Visitors Center, I remember Sister West telling us, “I think; no, I know that there is someone out there for you to share the gospel with.”  Turns out there have been several someones my family and I have had the chance to share the gospel with since she made that statement!  What a great blessing it has been for me to be involved (even in just a small way) in teaching the gospel to these someones over the course of the past two years.  There have been some heartaches along the way, but mostly there has been joy as I've watched investigators grasp hold of the gospel's message and enter the waters of baptism.  What a great privilege to continue to serve these brothers and sisters through teaching the Gospel Principles Sunday school class and the Aaronic Priesthood classes to the new convert brethren.  All of these opportunities have been such a strength to my testimony as I've learned in a very keen way what it means to be a shepherd.  Don't misunderstand, I have no intention of abandoning these people—that would be a tragic mistake and would show that I've learned nothing—but, at the same time, my focus will turn in a different direction as the brother who will be called as ward mission leader assumes the duties I've tried my best to fulfill during my time in this calling.

Along with the change in working with investigators and new converts, my contact with the missionaries will lessen.  That is something I will also miss.  I've mentioned this before, but one of the great blessings of serving as the ward mission leader has been the caliber of the young men who I have had the chance to work with over these two years.  Not only did the Lord bless me with an opportunity to serve the investigators and convert brothers and sisters who have been baptized into the Church, but having the missionaries influence in our home has blessed my whole family.  Not only did Ben have opportunities to team up with the Elders, but Jennifer did as well.  Now Isaac is very excited to shortly have the chance to go out with them as he will soon be ordained as a priest.

Growing up in Utah and a strong LDS community in Wyoming caused me to not know what it was like to feel the spirit and influence of missionaries as I was growing up—I don't recall ever seeing missionaries in the towns where I grew up.  Without that background, I was so clueless when I came into the mission field.  I'm sure there were days when my trainer, Elder Sandstrom, wondered what he was going to do with this hick for the sticks he'd been assigned to train.  Thankfully, he was patient with me and allowed me to take on each new challenge when I was ready for it (and sometimes when I wasn't ☺).  My sons have had an opportunity I didn't.  They have had the chance to be around the Elders and to feel of the special spirit carried by these ambassadors of Jesus Christ.  This has helped Ben during these last two years of preparation for his mission and has helped Isaac in many different ways.  Again, I don't plan to abandon the missionaries, but the relationship will change as I won't be specifically helping them as much as I have.  I actually got a bit choked up when I told them Friday night that I was going to be released.  I didn't think it was fair for them to get blindsided today, so I wanted to prepare them for what was going to happen.

So, the question, what am I going to be doing now?  I've been called as the first counsellor in the Young Men's presidency.  I'll be serving with president Jeff Carter (which is interesting since I served as his first counsellor several years ago when he was call as Elder's quorum president) and Steve Short (second counsellor and scout master).  That was twist I didn't see coming.  I've never served in the Young Men's program—sure, I was the counsellor over the deacons and then the teachers while I was in the bishopric, but that's not the same.  Now I'm in the trenches with the young men.  As I've thought about this new call over the last 48 hours, I've come to 2 conclusions as to how I can be of service: 1) with the background I've gained as the ward mission leader, I hope that I can help the young men realize that the lessons they teach each Sunday can be a guide to help them teach with the Spirit as they will be asked to do as missionaries; and 2) I think this will give me a chance to help Isaac get more out of the YM program.  More realizations may come as I go along, but those are the 2 that stand out as of now.  I'm grateful for blessings I've received and for chances to stretch and learn (which will definitely be happening with this calling).  I'm thankful for the gospel and hope I can be of service.

Escort

There have been two other times that I recall when I have held this title: escort.  Two other times I have had the opportunity to escort a brother who was entering the temple for the first time to receive the endowment blessings for himself.  It is a wonderful privilege.  When a man or woman enters the temple for the first time, he or she can choose a person of the same gender to stand with him or her throughout the endowment experience.  The sacred nature of the temple endowment precludes me from going through the process in a public blog post such as this (or even a private journal entry), suffice it to say that the responsibility of an escort is to answer questions or assist in helping the first time attendee understand what to do next during the temple ordinance if the occasion requires.  Because the escort has already gone through the ordinance for himself or herself, he or she can act as a guide and can assist the first time person in this manner.  I do not believe the other two brethren will take offense at my next statement, but my experience as an escort today was one of the most profound events of my life—today I served as a temple escort for my son Ben.

Having received the Melchizedek Priesthood and his missionary call, he became eligible to partake of the blessings of the endowment ordinance of the temple to give him the "endowment from on high" (D&C 105:33) promised by the Lord to His people and to take upon himself the additional protective covenants offered only through the endowment ceremony.  These covenants will stand as protective spiritual armor (see Ephesians 6:13-18) as he goes out into the mission field (away from family and friends) and teaches the gospel of Jesus Christ to those with whom he comes into contact in the Colorado Denver North Mission.  Also, through the endowment, Ben has come to better understand his relationship with his Savior.  By receiving the temple covenants willingly, with "a broken heart and a contrite spirit" (3 Nephi 9:20), he has placed himself in a greater position to understand how the Atonement of Christ affects him personally and how to receive it in his life: "Behold, mine arm of mercy is extended towards you, and whosoever will come, him will I receive; and blessed are those who come unto me" (3 Nephi 9:14).

As I sat next to Ben during the endowment ordinance and either helped him or whispered quick statements to him, I was so happy to have him there with me partaking of the blessings of the temple that I have come to love and cherish.  During confirmation blessings (either for my family members or for others), I have felt impressed to state that Father in Heaven is pleased with the person's decision to be baptized.  Today, I felt this same feeling for myself.  I was very pleased to sit next to Ben and watch him out of the corner of my eye take the additional temple covenants upon himself.  My joy was very full as I recognized the blessings that await him as he remains faithful to those covenants.  As Jennifer and I welcomed him into the Celestial Room, I cried tears of joy in his behalf, knowing the tremendous step he had completed.

I was also very thankful to the ward members who were able to come and participate in the temple with us today.  Since seating is limited, not everyone who wanted to come was able to, but I am thankful for everyone who were there either personally or in desire.  As we reunited with Isaac outside the temple (we found out that the group we had set him up to do baptisms and confirmations with had not come to the temple, but that temple workers had rallied to serve Isaac in his desire to participate in those ordinances while he waited for us), I was showered with a feeling of joy to have Jennifer and both my sons with me.  They have done so much to bless my life; they have been so patient and forgiving when I wasn't sure I deserved either patience or forgiveness.  I am blessed; and I thank my Heavenly Father for those blessings and am grateful for His gift of the Savior to me.  Without Jesus and His extended arms of mercy, I would be so lost and my life would be so hopeless—with Him I continue to have hope and know that I can have my rough edges smoothed and polished.

We now have less than a month until Ben leaves us to begin his missionary service.  With the added protection and blessings he has received in the Redlands Temple for himself today (a protection that we want to help him better understand as we plan at least 3 more temple visits before he reports), I know that he will do his best as he embarks on that personal, spiritual adventure.

Newly Licensed & Prepared for the Temple

I decided not to write a vacation post about our return trip home on July 24th—there wasn't much interesting about that day other than our stop in Orem at the Missionary Mall.  As I mentioned in my Salt Lake City vacation post, the last thing on our "major" list of things to purchase for Ben were slacks.  I figured I'd already donated enough of my money to Mr. Mac and I wanted to give this other store a try.  The actual store was not exactly what I expected.  I guess when I heard the word "mall," I was thinking an actual mall.  As we drove up University Parkway, I expected to pass over State Street and find the place somewhere in the University Mall area.  Instead, we found it on the right hand side of University Parkway about a half a block before reaching State Street.  If it hadn't been for the huge missionary on the top of the store, I probably would have driven right past the place.

We found quite a nice selection of missionary clothing and other items.  Our specific task was to buy Ben some slacks for those days when he isn't required to wear a suit ensemble. ☺  When it comes to finding pants for Ben, waist size isn't a problem; length is.  Going to a "big and tall" store isn't much of an option either because at those places length may not be a problem, but waist size is (apparently all "big and tall" stores seem to think that every man with long legs also has at least a 38" waist to start).  The Missionary Mall saved us the headache of trying to find Ben appropriate length—all the slacks came in oversize lengths that could then be altered to fit him (and the crowd goes wild)!  While this was an awesome thing, it also presented a new problem: how long would it take for the alterations to be made?  Thankfully, with the day being Pioneer Day (a Utah State holiday), business was light.  Our salesman went into the back and returned to tell us the seamstress could have all three slacks completed in 30 minutes (score! ☺).  Thirty minutes later, we were back on the I-15.  Ben wanted to stop at the Payson Temple, but it was closed for the holiday—we would only be able to view it from the gate—and I wanted to get home at a decent hour so we put it on hold until our return trip.

As for today, this was Ben's one and only chance (at least, that's the impression we were under) to take his physical driving test to receive his driver's license.  He and Jennifer actually attempted to do this on Tuesday of this week, but the windshield of Jennifer's car suffered from a whack by a large rock several months ago which then resulted in a crack that snaked in several directions.  With our focus on Ben's mission and the money needed to purchase his clothing and such, the windshield has not been fixed.  When the lady administering the driving test came out to go through the preliminaries with Ben, she apparently didn't notice the windshield crack until she actually sat down in the passenger's seat—instant fail.  I guess if nothing else, this was a good catalyst to get the windshield replaced. ☺  Jennifer rescheduled the driving test for today and was told that the DMV was booked solid until September 2nd (a problem since that's the day Ben's entering the MTC).  A special seminary inservice meeting this morning kept Jennifer occupied this morning, so I went with Ben to the DMV.  The results were positive!  If he had messed up on any of the preliminary section or had missed two more of the driving skills, we would have been praying for someone to cancel their driving test before we left to return to Utah.  Instead, Ben is now a licensed driver and we can check that off his missionary list.

The rest of our afternoon was spent with Alana and her parents as we drove down to the Beehive Clothing store in Upland.  They purchased temple clothes for her, and we did the same for Ben.  Next week, both Ben and Alana will be going through the temple for the first time to take out their own endowments.  This is a very exciting thing.  Because of the limited seating (the Redlands Temple is not like Los Angeles; only about 6o—roughly—people can attend a session), there are 20 reserved slots for family and ward members for Ben and the same for Alana.  I guess the remaining 20 are for anyone else who makes an appointment for that time frame.  It was fun for me to be involved with helping Ben in this process.  This is something I have looked forward to for 18 years as we have taken him and Isaac on trips to the Los Angeles temple or have watched as the Redlands Temple was built or have visited various other temples while on vacation.  He has been able to go inside the Redlands Temple and participate in baptisms and confirmations for those who have died.  Now, however, he will be able to walk past the recommend desk and turn to the right instead of the left to participate in the next temple ordinances available to him as he prepares for his mission.  I very much look forward to next week. ☺