Isaac's 1st Sacrament Blessing & Ben's Farewell

Two important things happened today: Isaac blessed the sacrament for the first time and Ben gave his "farewell" address to the ward.  While I was picking up an investigator who needed a ride to church (his car is in the shop), Ben asked Jordan (who happened to be the only other priest in our meeting today) if he and I could accompany Isaac at the sacrament table—Jordan graciously allowed us to participate.  As the three of us sat down behind the sacrament table, I couldn't help but remember the time four years ago when Isaac was ordained as a deacon and he, Ben and I participated in passing the sacrament together.  The next time I was able to bear my testimony after that experience, I told the congregation that I have a montage of pictures at my desk showing me with Ben and Isaac at places, venues or life moments over the years (I chosen one picture per year for the last 9 years).  But no matter how memorable our experiences captured by those photos have been, nothing could top the experience I had as I passed the sacrament with them—until today.

Just before the sacrament hymn began, Isaac told me he was both nervous and excited.  When I asked him which prayer he wanted to say, he told me he wanted to say the prayer over the bread.  I started to tell him to take a deep breath and say the prayer clearly and succinctly, but the singing started before I could mention those thoughts.  Isaac was in the middle, with me at his right and Ben at his left.  I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he took his time breaking the bread.  There were 5 trays, so he only had to focus on the one in the middle, but he did so very conscientiously.  The hymn ended and he knelt to say the prayer.  His nervousness got the better of him a few times and he had to correct himself.  Bishop asked him to say it again.  He composed himself and said the prayer a second time.  The first time had worked out his nerves and he did better the second time.  We passed the trays of bread to the Aaronic Priesthood teachers and deacons and returned to our seats.  I patted Isaac on the knee and told him he did a good job.  After returning the bread trays to the table and uncovering the water trays, Ben said the prayer over the water.  When all who were desirous to partake of the emblems had received them, we placed the water trays back on the table, carefully covered them and returned to our seats.

Wow!  What a great experience!  Next week is stake conference.  After the Sunday session, Ben will be set apart as a missionary and then we will drive to Utah to drop him off at the Provo Missionary Training Center.  Today was the only time we could serve together at the sacrament table before Ben leaves.  There is no picture of this event to add to my montage at work, but the memory is forever emblazoned in my mind: me and my two sons, serving together as we administer the sacrament to the congregation.  After the meeting, there were several people who told me they enjoyed Ben's talk, but they enjoyed even more watching us at the sacrament table.  I am grateful that we are all worthy to serve.

After Jennifer shared a brief testimony, Ben was given the opportunity to speak.  He mentioned that in May of 2013 that he received his patriarchal blessing.  Only a few months later, he injured his back which eventually brought his disorder to light along with all of the problems that accompanied it.  He expressed that without his patriarchal blessing to help him keep things in perspective, he would have been so lost.  Two years of trial have prepared him for the two years of missionary service now ahead of him.  His talk assignment was to discuss the things he has done to prepare for his mission.  He told us there were four things his trials have helped him to learn, which in turn has prepared him for his mission:

1) Patience - As he worked through his trials, Ben found that he needed to be patient with himself and with the Lord.  I was reminded of a talk on patience by Elder Neal A. Maxwell referenced in an article in this month's Ensign.  Elder Maxwell taught: "Patience is tied very closely to faith in our Heavenly Father. Actually, when we are unduly impatient we are suggesting that we know what is best—better than does God. ... Patience is a willingness, in a sense, to watch the unfolding purposes of God with a sense of wonder and awe, rather than pacing up and down within the cell of our circumstance" (“Patience” [Brigham Young University devotional, Nov. 27, 1979], 1, 2, speeches.byu.edu).  From what Ben said, I believe he has gained a greater perspective of God’s unfolding purposes for him.

2) Scripture study - Ben had faltered on his scripture study for several months before his appendix burst inside of him last July.  One of the things that happened to him while he was stuck in the hospital for 11 days was that he got back into the routine of reading his scriptures every day and he hasn’t faltered since.  This has been a blessing to him and has helped him to teach when he has teamed up with the missionaries.

3) What the Church means to him - During these last two years, Ben said he has gained a greater understanding of what the Church means to him.  To my mind, he has become more fully converted to the gospel of Jesus Christ and its teachings as he now desires to, as he expressed it, "be one of Jesus' sheep and do whatever He asks of me."  His attitude reminded me of a quote from a conference talk given by Sister Bonnie L. Oscarson, "For ... all of us, conversion to gospel principles comes through righteously living the principles of the gospel and being true to our covenants with the Lord" (Ensign, Nov. 2013, 76).  Ben's stronger conversion and greater understanding of what the Church means to him personally have helped him prepare to take on the added covenants of the temple and the additional responsibility to serve as a missionary.

4) He is never alone - He thanked us, his family, for being there for him and doing little things that have helped him get through his hard times (he thanked friends as well).  But as much as we have all tried to help him and be there for him, none of us can escape the fact that we truly do not completely understand what he is feeling at times.  For that, he expressed the knowledge that he has obtained to know that Father in Heaven is always there for him and Jesus Christ knows what he is going through.  I was reminded of Elder David A. Bednar's testimony: "There is no physical pain, no spiritual wound, no anguish of soul or heartache, no infirmity or weakness you or I ever confront in mortality that the Savior did not experience first. In a moment of weakness we may cry out, 'No one knows what it is like. No one understands.' But the Son of God perfectly knows and understands, for He has felt and borne our individual burdens" (Ensign, May 2014, 90).  Ben has gained a strong understanding of Christ’s perfect empathy.

I know there are people in the Colorado Denver North Mission who are waiting to hear Ben's unique experiences.  The Lord is sending him to this area of His vineyard because of the opportunities for growth that he will experience and the people who he will be able to lift and who will lift him.  If he goes out and applies himself to the best of his ability, he will be successful in finding these people; member and non-member.  After Ben concluded his talk and we sang the intermediate hymn, I looked him and he looked at me.  Not a word was spoken between us, but the moment spoke volumes and caused us both to cry.  I recalled a similar moment when Ben was a new-born.  He was struggling with major reflux problems (he couldn't hold his food down—I learned this the hard way when he projectile vomited all over me after I fed him his bottle one night) and had been placed in the NICU at Loma Linda for a week while the doctors tried to figure out how to help him.  Our bishop, at that time, came with me to help give Ben a blessing during his first night in the hospital.  After I concluded the blessing, I remember a similar look passed between us.  Ben's spirit-self shone through his eyes at that moment as if to say, "Thank you, Dad.  Don't worry; I'll get through this."  Eighteen years later, we've helped each other get through the trials that have come our way.  I've known for years that he has a strong spirit; it will serve him well during this next chapter of his life.